Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Friday, December 23, 2011

Christmas Memories


A comfortable, safe, fire-lit or candle-lit darkness.... Perhaps a faint, lingering remembrance of the sheltering, life sustaining environs of the womb.  Protected and cared for, warm and surrounded by love.  These are my early associations with Christmas.  Family traditions weaving a pattern of togetherness and belonging through the fabric of my life....  Like the rolling out and icing of sugar cookies that were cut into shapes of bells and stars, trees, angels and reindeer.  Forming the Mexican wedding cookie dough (my Dad's favorite) into crescents and smothering the fresh-baked partial moons in layers of powdered sugar while still warm. The small galley kitchen was a center for mother-daughter activity which included the production of fudge and cheese biscuit delicacies and small bread pans filled with sweet batters (strawberry and poppy seed) waiting for their day to be given as gifts to neighbors and friends.

Other than the one outing to the fir tree farm to cut our own holiday icon (which was an adventure); we typically searched the fire station lot diagonal from our home or the specially set up lot in the empty grassy plot by Ben Franklin and High's Ice Cream. Huge white bulbs hung from draping wires as we lifted one tree then another trying to agree upon which was the best.Then in a shower of needles and tumbling of branches the volunteer would stuff it in or strap it to the car; so we could bring it home.

There was always the event of my Dad trimming the bottom limbs and base of the tree in order to make what always turned out to be an awkward, twisted trunk fit into the stand.  We did have that one time when my Mom and Dad were out for a Christmas party and the tree tipped so dangerously that my sister had to stand precariously holding it for dear life while my brother telephoned some of our oldest family friends.  Mr. Gunter came right over to handle our tree emergency which if I recall correctly required a secure tether.  There was also that other time my parents were out and the front, wide bay windowsill caught on fire due to the large cylindrical candle and encircling holly, but all in all there were no serious decoration mishaps over the years.

My southern Mother has the gift of making a home truly welcoming and lovely for the holidays. Fresh greens: pine or holly with bright orangey-red berries or even magnolia draped along stair rails and mantels, around tall, thin Williamsburg candles and accented with stiff, full cloth ribbon bows. Between the smells of the kitchen, candle fragrance, cinnamon and clove bedecked pineapples, oranges or other fruit pyramids, flickering candles in the windows and Christmas tree lights, stockings hung and log fires; the house was magical.

We strung popcorn and cranberry chains, trying to eat less of the former than we put needle through; and watched seasonal specials like the stop-motion animation favorite "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer," fearing the Abominable (well, I did anyway) and never knowing the snowman narrator was the famous Burle Ives. We loved the original "A Charlie Brown Christmas" with Vince Guaraldi's incredible jazz-piano compositions and Linus' indomitable wisdom beyond his years.  I read on Wiki that Coca-Cola was the original television sponsor for this show, but all I remember were those Peanuts' cameos in the Dolly Madison snack cake commercials.

Every December 24th we shared a special, formal Christmas meal with the above mentioned family friends at their house or ours; and then, bedecked in velvet and curls (not my brother - he wore a coat and tie), we piled into the station wagon or current family vehicle and drove to Trinity Presbyterian Church for their Christmas Eve service.  The purple and pink candles were re-lit on the Advent Wreath and the white Christ candle finally flickered and burned.  I loved sitting on the dark wooden balcony pew surrounded by family, hearing the Christmas Story re-told in parts interspersed with the familiar holiday carols. The sweetness of the story, the excitement and anticipation of what the next day held, and the novelty of being at church at an unusual time swirled comfortably around me.  Finally the expected passing of candle light.  Each of us holding our own small white candle, receiving light from the one beside us and passing it along.  It's wonderful to watch the beacons of light spread and prevade the darkness.  Then we sang "Silent Night" raising and lowering the candles in unison to the music and finally filing out of the building, some times to freezing cold or even delicate flurries of snow, we blew out the tiny flames and exchanged warm Christmas wishes before heading into the crisp, star-lit night.

Once home my sister and I, if we didn't first watch "A Christmas Carol" (of which I was mortally terrified), climbed the stairs; donned our matching floral flannel nightgowns with yokes and edges trimmed in eyelet lace; and got into the twin beds in the room we shared, but would one day be hers alone. The room had three windows and the headlights of passing cars traveled through them in an arc across the ceiling.  From the side window we had a fairly good view of the winter night sky and my brother and sister assured me repeatedly over the early years that they could make out Rudolph's nose from a distance through it.  This is irregardless of the fact that a traffic light also stood sentinel in that general direction. It was hard to go to sleep that night.

I guess you can tell, my memories are all sweet.  Even from the Christmas when I was sick.  Year after year one of my favorite things to do was to lay by the fireplace watching the flames and eventual glowing embers and experience the warmth surrounding me, inside and out.  I also loved to sneak into the dark living room and position myself underneath the glowing Christmas tree looking up through the branches at the myriad of twinkling, blinking lights.  Of course, I enjoyed the ever growing number of red and green wrapped and be-ribboned packages under the tree.  And at times we were allowed to choose one to open on Christmas Eve. But in my quiet heart, I loved and love still the primitive hand-carved wooden nativity from the Holyland settled in the candlelight and Christmas greens of the coffee table the best. I could sit there suspended in time and surrounded in the comforting darkness, looking at and touching the figures, because the Light of the whole world shone in my little girl world.  And Love had come.

 This is not my Mother's own nativity, but almost identical. Thank you to Avondale Patillo UMC for this photo from their church display.

Hope you have a wonderful, meaningful celebration of this special season!


Thursday, January 28, 2010

Thankful Thursday - #s 21-30

I am thankful...

21. that my travelers returned safe and sound - my son from snowboarding with 2 x 10-12 hour sleeper bus* rides & my husband from a week out of the country working on our new visas.

After Last Year's Trip
22.for a kind and thoughtful mother-in-law & grandmother to the boys, who treats me like a true daughter and serves as a wonderful role model. She also called this week. :)

23. for the many patient and loving individuals who have invested in who I am now and will be.

24.for the privilege and adventure of living on the other side of the world from my home country.

25.for a lovely yellow house on a hill, waiting for me.

26.for the convenience of city living; where most apartment complexes have mini-marts, vegetable & meat markets, grocery stores, and restaurants within reasonable walking distance.

27.for 15lbs of Korean refined sugar and15lbs of flour bought from my friend whose coffers ranneth over from a bulk supply order.

28.for friendship

29.for my family far away who keeps me in their hearts, thoughts, and prayers.

30.for the whole-hearted commitment of male and female adult leaders who serve the city-wide middle school & high school youth program. They came a long way, for little or no pay, and lots of eternal repercussions.

*Interior of a Sleeper Bus
Thankful Thursday is hosted by Rhondi at Rose Colored Glasses.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Flashback Friday - Katie 1999-2000

Katie as a kitten.

When the boys were small, we lived two years in Thailand. My husband's work required that he travel quite a bit, and my oldest son started 1st grade. We acquired a very sweet and beautiful Calico which we renamed Molly. But I was still a little lonely. Often, after the younger boys and I finished grocery shopping at Carrefore, we would stop in the small pet shop on the bottom floor of the building. One little black kitten there, in particular, tugged at our heartstrings. Whenever we approached, she would come up to the side of the cage, stand up, and touch her paw to my fingertip. So one day, while my forbearing husband was away, we brought her home with us. It took our mature, senior cat, Molly, and Katie (our new kitten) a while to adjust to each other. Much to Molly's chagrin, Katie was quite playful and took great joy in pouncing on and generally irritating her. In the course of asserting her supremacy, Molly gave Katie a severe gash which necessitated a trip to the vet and stitches. From this incident on, our two pets were as mother and daughter.

Pregnant Katie

Both cats were dear to us, but Molly sort of drifted away (staying out for days at a time) as Katie grew up and had kittens of her own (twice). I'm not sure if Katie is typical of all Thai cats or not. She had sleek black fur and golden eyes. Her mew was incredibly loud like the sound of a crying toddler and she talked all the time. She had a warm, affectionate heart. Her "love language" must have been physical touch, and she was extremely perceptive and thoughtful. She birthed her first litter of kittens in the boys' sock tray and proved to be a very conscientious mother, grabbing her children by the scruff of their necks and attempting to drag them back upstairs when they had become big and frisky enough for us to take out to play.

The first litter.
When we moved back to China, Katie and Moses (her only kitten we had not given away) had to stay behind. They went to roam and explore the new smells and wild life at a friend's rural Thai farm.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Who Knew

With the coming on of the New Year (and completion of a decade at that), a few thoughtful friends have written reliving events we were involved in together 10 years ago. They referenced us being in the states during Y2K, and I looked at my husband and said, " I totally don't remember this." His reply was something like, "Sure you do, I was brought home for a meeting and we all went to celebrate Christmas and New Year's." Then it came back to me as fresh as yesterday. December 1999 was the year that we learned that our son had Asperger's Syndrome, a form of high functioning autism. We had been living in Thailand at the time and his terrifically sharp 1st grade teacher had noticed that he was just a little bit different - some times in his own world and some times taking all the other students along with him. His fine motor skills were poor, and during clean up time she would often find him under the childsize table examining the colorful scraps of papers left over from art projects. That was the year they started the "Bug Club" in his class; because he was fascinated with creepy crawlies, moths, and butterflies. We had always known that he was unique (as each of our children have proved to be); but he, particularly, had a world of imagination that he could move in and out of and share. Many times when he was imagining, he would run back and forth waving his fingers. We had asked a counselor about this before, but had never been given any reason to pursue it. Anyway, my husband was away at his meeting when I took my son to a wonderful lady psychiatrist in my home town. She confirmed a diagnosis of Aspergers, some thing we had never heard of before. We both googled it in our separate locations and, as at the time the only information available included the most serious and bleak scenarios, began to let the diagnosis sink in. Our responses were very different. I remember feeling some sort of relief like being given a key to better understand, discipline, and care for our vibrant son. I remember my husband broke down as we talked about it on the phone. He was thinking of all the relational experiences that our son would never have. As it turns out (10 years later), some things have been much harder than I could ever have imagined; but most things have been more amazing than we could have foreseen. We have three extremely special, unique sons; with varying and tremendous strengths and some weaknesses, and all have been blessed with great friendships.

Da Boyz Christmas 1999

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